Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child

Current research suggest that a person’s emotional intelligence is more important than their academic intelligence in predicting success in life. Too often parents focus on their children’s academic skill set with very little attention given to help them understand and manage their emotions. This is one of the best books I have found that addresses the importance of coaching children to develop healthy ways to manage emotions.

The Disease To Please

Harriet Braiker’s book an easy read.  It isn’t weighted with theory or too many examples.  The reader can quickly learn what kind of “pleaser” they are, and the book ends with a twenty-one day plan to turn around a pattern of pleasing that would otherwise render one hopelessly depressed, angry and/or exhausted…which is how many people are when they first come for counseling. This is another standard homework assignment for clients who want to shorten their time in the therapy office.

Confidence Beyond Measure

Dr. Sullivan’s book provides a fascinating body of evidence for the origins of self-confidence in each of us. This is followed by important information about blocks to self-confidence and practical suggestions to have more self-confidence. I have used visualization as a treatment strategy for years, and Dr. Sullivan’s book has effective visualization exercises.

Keeping The Love You Find

Dr. Hendrix explains how our childhood (whether typical or tragic) forms unconscious strengths and weaknesses within us that drive how we respond to the opposite sex and ultimately “partner” with someone. The book provides a brief but powerful overview of developmental tasks through childhood and adolescence, launching the reader on a path of self-discovery.  I can confidently state that every client who has undertaken this “assignment” has benefited by learning more about the unconscious patterns that have influenced their lives.

Love Busters

Some times counselors do a postmortem of a marriage with a newly divorced client, trying to discover where the trouble began. It is uncanny how many of the fault lines (pun intended) were drawn early in the relationship, and many of these interaction patterns are identified in Harley’s book. This book is aptly titled! It is on my recommended reading list for couples; married or contemplating marriage.

Sacred Marriage

Many times when couples come for counseling, they have secretly or openly identified their spouse as the problem, and they are almost “out the door,” to get a divorce. If either or both partners have taken their marriage vows as a sacramental covenant with God, I recommend this book. Chapter by chapter, Thomas builds a strong case for building Godly character as one looks for meaning in hardships within marriage. With a new perspective many couples have a helpful attitude and earnest desire to try again.

Getting The Love You Want – Workbook

This Workbook and the companion book by the same name are my “top shelf” recommendations for couples in tough times. Drs. Hendrix and Hunt reveal the underlying issues that fuel most difficulties for couples. This book and workbook help an individual discover how their upbringing may influence their interpretations about conflict, intimacy and expectations. Most who read these books describe a highly beneficial endeavor, transformative….changing how they respond to their partner, their children and their extended family.